Fast food for thought

In my travels across the country, I have eaten in virtually every fast food joint at one time or another. Some bad, some good, some I have no idea how to put into words what it was. Anyway, I thought it'd be good for my tens of readers to get a general idea of what I go through at most fast food places. Here's a typical convo between me and a food service specialist.

Food Specialist: Can I help you? Scoot Shelnut: Yeah, I'll have a hamburger plain, just meat and bread, small fries, and a sweet tea. FS: You want cheese on that? SS: Um, no...just meat and bread. I thought I said that. FS: You want to biggie size that? SS: Well, no just the small, like I ordered, will be fine. FS: Any sauce for your nuggets? SS: Uh, I didnt order any nuggets. FS: Oh, sorry. That'll be $12.57 please. SS: Whoa, for just a hamburger fries and a sweet tea?? Are you on crack?? FS: Oh sorry, my register is messed up. Let me get my manager.........Manager: Can I help you?...... I get into this pretty much every day of my life. They look at me like I'm the idiot when I don't want mayonnaise on MY hamburger. I hate mayonnaise, and Cracker Barrell seems to take it upon themselves to put in on there even when I specifically ask them not to. How considerate of them. Another small thing these places should address is the "funky sticky stuff" on 90% of ketchup packets nowadays. What in the wide world of sports is that stuff? It feels and looks like pine tar or something. I think one of the genii in management packs the ketchup with the honey, instead of packing them seperately. I swear I'm gonna open my own restaurant one day, and all you'll be able to order is plain burgers, fries, and drinks. Wont even have any condiments other than ketchup, so the food service specialists wont get too confused. :o)